When I buy a used car I expect the salesman to act like-a used car
salesman. I believe they are just doing their job and should be
admired for their energy and gregariousness. When I meet a person out
in the regular world and they act like a used car salesman then I am
suspicious. I suspect these folks are either Dale Carnegie graduates
or believe they are still in high school running for homecoming king
or queen. Here is the thing; these folks need regular and plentiful
forage for their very own egos. They seek popularity, acceptance and
the admiration of those around them. They are slaves, slaves to their
I chose some time ago to smile only when I meant it and maintain my
own sovereignty. When you see others’ approval as the only indication
of your own success or correctness of your ideas, your are lost. I
would admit some very successful people have followed this insincere
pathway of constant approval-seeking as a map to prestige and money.
They are empty souls decorated in their own meaningless success.
I have chosen a different path-a cleaner, more sincere path. I don’t
parrot back words to people so they falsely believe we have the same
ideas nor do I look deeply into the eyes of folks I don’t know and
nod like a bobblehead. I also do not begin a phone call by repeating
the caller’s name three times in the first minute of conversation to
create false familiarity. I find strangers calling each other by
first name creepy and insincere. I do not act friendly or create
friendships to earn money.
Here is what I do: God, wife, boss. It is that simple. I please God
first, then my wife and finally my boss. I am happy when someone
someone respects me, offers their friendship or gives me a slice of
their admiration. However I do not crave it nor do I solicit these
things. My credo for life is simple in that without God I will have
nothing or will lose what I do have. I will not have love and the
deepest friendship without my wife. Finally, without the respect of
my boss I will not have a means to live my life.
I am not anti-social, actually I am quite social and my friends are
the best. It is simply this; I welcome friendship, respect and all of
the other human things however as long as I have my three (God, wife,
boss) I will get along no matter what occurs in life. This is such a
freedom in that each positive human contact and friendship feels so
good and natural-not contrived in the ways that some seek to “win
friends and influence people.” I learned much of this after my first
marriage ended in divorce. I decided at that time that I was better
off by myself and that I would only let those into my world who
enriched my life. My basic three (God, wife, boss) became my fortress
from which I could observe others and draw near those who showed true
sincerity, good work ethic and respect.
If this column offends you please remember that what I say boils down
to one word, sincerity. If my words make you angry then your anger is
with yourself. Sometimes growth can begin with such emotion and I
wish you good luck. I found my own path in the simple philosophy of
God, wife and boss.