Renewed hunger for life

My storage tank of column ideas was empty until last night. I had a
good dream that made me think; which then made me write-which brings
us to the business at hand.

I had a friend die a few years ago. He was a good guy who was also a
good farmer. The dream I had involved a scenario where an older
farmer needed help putting in his crops. My deceased friend and I
took on the task and were working on equipment in a shop next to a
corn field. It was all so real that I can even remember the moist
smell of fresh rain and the location of various puddles in the yard.
At one point, we raced each other on foot to the house for dinner.
I’m always hungry, even in my dreams, I’m always hungry.

Here’s the deal, I felt great when I woke up. I had a little
different perspective on life and that’s the story I want to share.

I have been existing in stasis the last month. My mind is locked into
the work of spring but the weather has prevented my body from joining
my mind. I hate this this feeling and it is almost like I have been
tolerating life until it begins to mirror my expectations.

I thought about my dream and how I was enjoying such simple things;
planning work, executing the plan, being hungry and the motion of
racing to dinner. There will be a time in all of our lives when those
simple things will fade or simply go dark. This is the time to not
wish for the things you want but want the things that already exist.
These are the memories that you must squirrel away for a time when
memories may become tough to make.

I crave the traditional beauty of spring but maybe I can take some
joy in the changing landscape as the piles of snow slowly lose height
if not weight. Maybe I can enjoy the delicious expectation of the
weather I know will soon arrive, like wanting to destroy Christmas
wrapping as you burrow through cardboard to the gift. I like how the
sunshine slowly changes my environment after which the changes are
locked into place by the cold until the next spell of warm weather.
This maybe isn’t as dramatic as blooms or green grass but it is
interesting. This time of year is also great for bird-watching as
word has really spread that we offer a decent sunflower buffet so we
have a lot of birds to see.

My friend passed on some years ago and left a good life for many of
us to model. Last night I needed a kick in the pants to start
enjoying life again and he gave me a good, gentle boot. The dream
made me covet what I see instead wishing for something else and
showed me path to be grateful for the fullness of what has already
been given to me. The shade of want has been pulled from my eyes and
I can see how good it is to live. Now I gotta run, I’m hungry again.

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