Gimme Back my Bullets

Those who know me have probably heard me say, “just give me the bullets.” This is the phrase I use when I simply want basic information without embellishment or emotional theater (you know, drama.) This week’s column is dedicated to subject matter which either; has merit but lacks the meat to base a column, mentions an event which needs a little publicity or simply errant points which may only mean something to as few as one person.

Bullet One: Hey Travis, soul train is on.

Bullet Two: I created the phrase “breakfast burrito.” I used to eat like a carp when I worked at KKAQ radio (Thief River Falls, Mn)in the late 80′s. I would start my day with a stop at the old Valley Dairy convenience store to buy my morning burrito. I began to refer to it as my breakfast burrito but failed to copyright the fact. I am sure someone thought to wrap eggs, sausage and cheese in a burrito prior to my personal eureka moment but I will always feel like I am the father of this term. Never has one man been so proud of such a small accomplishment.

Bullet Three: Kjell Melvie asked me to mention the “Mailman and the Mayor” ride on Thursday, June 24th in Thief River Falls, Mn. He told me that almost all of the money generated by this event goes to either the Heritage Center or the Pennington Count Humane Society. I deeply respect our greatest generation and love animals so this is a nice event to give financial support. It is also a good way to use the new city atv ordinance which allows licensed four wheelers to ride most city streets and participate in the ride. It all starts at at four that afternoon at Gazebo park with entertainment from the “Wood Pics” and “Lois and Lois.” The Kiwanas are serving a picnic supper also with free will offering. Ride carefully, eat heartily and give with gusto.

Bullet Four:My mother in-law, Jeanette Walseth, has been writing the occasional letter to the editor in the Thief River Falls Times. Her common sense and sense of fair play are only on loan to the public as her full-time job is taking care of us. I have yet to get a word of bad advice from Jeanette; read her letters carefully.

Bullet Five: I believe use of the hands-free option on a telephone may be a breach of trust. A conversation between two people is one of the most intimate acts in which they can participate. I don’t care for the sort of “open relationship” that is created when one person believes they speak in confidence to another who unfortunately is too lazy to pick up the telephone handset. If you value my time and conversation, bend your elbow and place the phone to your ear; the hands-free option is to be used only when both participants agree to its usage. It is a shining example of how lazy we have become as a people and also very difficult to understand when you are on the other end.

I keep a notebook of ideas for my column, this was a nice way to clear up a few spiral-bound items that have been awaiting the spotlight. I hope you enjoyed the “bullet” format and I will plan to use it again when I find myself a few rounds short of a full clip.
 

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