Monthly Archives: January 2010

Letter to Dave

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Dear Dave,

I am happy to announce that I have joined a very exclusive club, Dave. It is a group of people that I was among once for a brief time but whose company I have not enjoyed for a couple of years, more on that later.

I have not watched the Minnesota Vikings play football for about 20 years. I think I went-off Vikings football as a result of cliffhanger losses and lack of a quarterback worthy of the shadow cast by Fran Tarkenton. Brett Favre entered the picture last fall, a quarterback who casts his own very large shadow. I got into Viking’s football this season and got emotionally involved and so was crushed by the New Orleans defeat of the Vikings in the National Football Conference championship. This was a game that could have been won with fewer fumbles and if the Viking’s offensive line had protected Favre. Thank goodness that Carrington, North Dakota native Jim Kleinsasser displayed some Midwestern toughness and helped give Favre a little margin of safety. I believe Kleinssaser played high school football with your son, Ryan, didn’t he? Our nephew, Jamie, and I watched the game at a local bar. We still have a few pipeline workers here from the recent project who’ve yet to go home so we could actually hear real Saint fans’ feedback each time their team failed to make a mistake. One Saint fan even enlightened us about football which explained…absolutely nothing.

My corn vacuum system is now in place. I can vacuum corn from an outdoor storage tank into our house and then burn it either of two corn stoves. This is a fairly elaborate system that guarantees me more chair time and less time spent carrying pails of corn. The crazy thing about this system is that it actually works and has been more than just a “learning experience.“ I have bored Lisa, everyone at work and even my readers with my obsession over our corn burning system and so today was your turn. I will now snap the rubber band on my wrist to break me away from this train of thought and move on.

Let’s get back to that exclusive club, Dave. I love my Belarus tractors but they sometimes lack the little extras, such as heat. Although I enjoyed a warm cab for maybe a week several years ago, my tractor quit heating soon after it began. At least I am out of the wind when I feed cattle and that seemed good enough. This week I was blowing snow when I noticed some tingling in my frozen feet; they were thawing which never occurs. I felt the air outlets in my cab and there was heat, quite a lot actually. I have now joined thousands of people who enjoy CAH (cab, air, heat) and plan to enjoy my membership right up to the point they show me the door back out into the cold.

I hope life in Carrington is good and you’ll have to let me know when you are finished remodeling. That way we can safely visit you and I won’t feel bad that I was unable fulfill my promise to help you pound nails.

Your little bro’

Love and Marriage

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I still enjoy re-runs of the television show “Married with Children.”
The title song for this series was Frank Sinatra’s, “Love and
Marriage” which, despite its comical intent, recently made me think
about the relationship between the choice of love and the act of
marriage.

I freed myself of the concept of love as being mere infatuation
several years ago. Prior to this time, I chased from one failed
relationship to another until I came to the conclusion that I would
simply enjoy a full, lonely portion of life and not share it with
anyone. Two weeks after I had buried my hopes for this immature love in the cemetery of
childish things I’d yet to put aside, I met Lisa. Lisa was patient
and kind with me, she let me grow into our relationship. If love is
truly patient, kind and never jealous then maybe love is not a thing
but rather a series of characteristics in which deep trust and
affection can grow and exist.

If we humans have the power to chose, then we may choose to grow the
characteristics that are love’s nitrogen. Perhaps it is here that we
can understand love; it is a choice. It is a series of decisions to
make ourselves worthy of trust and affection and able to give those
things back. Make no mistake, I fell for Lisa the second I saw her
beautiful smile and brown eyes. However, my love for Lisa was a
conscious decision in that I recognized her as someone who was
patient enough to give me time for growth, kind enough to love my
flawed self and a person who would choose to enjoy my success as her
own and not envy it. Lisa and I typically choose to forgive quickly and
unconditionally, which allows our relationship to move forward
instead of crushing it under the weight of bitterness. If you cannot
choose to forgive, you cannot choose to love.

My first thoughts of marriage were about the actual wedding day.
While the wedding is a big day in any marriage, it is still just one
day of a long career. A marriage is actually a civil contract in which you give your word to follow its terms. Some would say it attaches strings to love; I would say it is the greatest freedom. After you
are wed, you are free to completely trust the person who has your
best interests in mind as your futures are now one. Marriage grants
you the freedom to claim another as wholly yours and not feel
possessive as you are also wholly theirs. In the wedding vows you
agree to love your partner in sickness and in health, which has a
hidden benefit. If we truly only know God when we are meek and frail then is it such a leap to find we know our spouse more deeply when we need them during the times when we’re sick? The marriage vows are not something made to control people; they are borders in which
you can exercise artistic freedom to make you’re relationship unique.
The vows of a marriage ceremony are also a map to guide married
couples who’ve lost “true north” and for whom divorce seems like the
only path.

Love is not some fragile thing and neither is marriage. “Married with Children,” the television show that got me started on this column often made fun of love, marriage and even family. However, it often returned to the conclusion that no matter how bad life became, even the worst example of manhood, Al Bundy, would admit that he loves his wife and that he is definitely, “married with children.” Man, I find inspiration for these stories in the weirdest places.

Project Warming House

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I need an indoor project when its cold outside. Last year, my indoor project was a pump house so large that I was barely able to extract it from my shop. I set my sites at a lower multiplier this year and went for what is basically a bird house, but for multiple birds. This is project warming house.

First off, a bird house should probably be installed prior to winter so the birds can locate it and set up shop. However, I wouldn’t let that stop me from setting up some low-income aviary housing even if it was mid-winter. The house I made is designed especially to provide quick shelter for chickadees. I always figure the smaller an animal is, the more protection it needs; this would be a worthwhile project.

The warming house is just a box, so I won’t drown this column in endless detail. I believe the plans were something I used from 4-H when I was young. The house is six inches wide square and nine inches tall, however make one side a little longer so you have something to drive a nail through and into a post or tree. My research has shown me that the size of the hole is pretty important; it keeps big birds out yet is inviting to the chickadees. That said, the hole was supposed to be 1 ¾ inches in diameter but the nearest hole bit I had was 1 5/8 so I allowed myself this much. This isn’t a house made for permanent residence so drill the hole at the bottom of the front façade. The purpose of a warming house is that several birds may gather and perch away from the wind. I made three internal perches by drilling holes about every two inches on each sidewall and offset the middle set to take advantage of every bit of space. I then used a small wooden dowel to span the area between the holes to create internal seating space. I used pine because redwood is expensive and protected the exterior with a little spray-on sealant.

Warming house in place, I believe a person should make a nice environment for it’s visitors. Lisa saves any fat drippings in a bowl which we then leave outside for suet. Uncle Larry made a simple feeder for us by drilling large holes into a branch which we fill with peanut butter. I clean corn for our stove and spread the gleanings for the pigeons and squirrels. We don’t own any expensive feeders as the three dollar plastic ones work great and leave us more money to purchase bird food. Thistle seed is horribly expensive but I’ve found the wreaths that are made from pressed thistle seed last a long time plus they include a hanger and so serve as their own feeder. They seem to be a much better deal than the long plastic tubes.

So there’s a good project that does good for others. I used to build so many of these when I was a kid that my brother thought I was doing it for therapy. You don’t have to be crazy to build a warming house, just crazy about birds.

Wonderful Distractions

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I try to maintain my focus on whatever task is at hand. There are
times, however when a distraction is welcome. My favorite
distractions are the counter displays that await you at the cashier’s
desk; three favorites are my topic this week.

Let’s start with Lucas oil additive display that you see at many auto
parts stores. This display features a series of gears that intermesh and may be launched into movement by cranking a small handle. One set of gears is bathed in oil while another parallels the first and sits in oil plus the additive which the display intends to sell. I love the counter-rotation of the gears; it holds my attention like string does cats. It also
dramatically demonstrates how well the additive makes the oil adhere
to moveable parts. I have fallen prey to this wonderful distraction
and it has given me many enjoyable minutes while awaiting car parts.

I am a mechanical person; however I like electronic distractions
also. Hugo’s grocery store in Thief River Falls, Minnesota features a series of closed-circuit
televisions which scroll from one advertisement to another. I enjoy
the bright colors as they appear at an intensity just below the point
that creates seizures. Watching these little televisions is similar
to the meditative state exhibited by most folks sitting at a sports bar
watching the weather channel. My main motivation is waiting to see what animal is featured on the humane society advertisement as it scrolls past my view then back into the little bright box.

Finally, we have the turnstile-type display at Northwest Power Systems;
easily my favorite distraction. This display features a few dozen
varieties of electrical switches. There is the push button variety,
variable speed, delay, silver single-throws; an incredible variety. While these metal and plastic pieces control electricity, they are mechanical in their nature. Their activation requires human manipulation which is where I come into the picture. Each switch has a certain personality, makes a different sound or has a unique action. I like the crisp snap of one switch while the extra long toggle of another seems almost artistic in its inspiration. The little rocker switches are the rank and file workers which aren’t fancy but get the job done. The switch display is on a carousel that allows you to turn to a different bank of what is for sale. Even after a couple of year of observing and interacting with this display, I still expect something new each time I turn it. I guess I’m really smitten.

I don’t know if anyone exists who is quite as enamored with counter displays as I am; probably not. I do however know that while there are those who say there is not enough to do in town, I would say they are just not looking at the right counter.